Time administration and group have by no means come naturally to me. When life grew to become unmanageable—a relentless since my second baby arrived—I seemed to the specialists. Not as soon as did I consider listening to my very own rhythm and physique. Productiveness, I assumed, was one thing to grasp, not one thing to know.
Then I hit a wall.
I used to be uninterested in feeling like this, so I finished combating my very own nature. I finished taking productiveness recommendation from individuals who don’t have ADHD.
For years, I had been making an attempt to contort myself into somebody I wasn’t—structured, disciplined, and neatly organized. An individual who might comply with a system designed for a mind that didn’t work like mine. Why had I ever believed I might handle my time the identical manner they did?
The shift was delicate however modified every thing. I’m unstuck, not languishing, shifting forward with goal. I do know I’ll get caught once more, however I additionally know this: I’m accomplished chasing options that have been by no means meant to work for me.
At this time, I’m sharing what does work—how I get issues accomplished with out draining myself within the course of. As a result of after we work in opposition to who we’re, burnout isn’t a risk. It’s a assure.
Notes on Productiveness, Relaxation, and Worthiness
A notice on productiveness.
I outline productiveness as doing what I mentioned I’d do—for myself, for others—in a manner that is sensible for my life. I spent two years making an attempt to heal burnout by “resting,” solely to really feel worse with every passing day. Seems, relaxation isn’t simply stillness. Some sorts of relaxation are lively, and studying to revive that modified every thing.
A notice on relaxation.
Completely different sorts of relaxation comply with totally different sorts of productiveness. Realizing what you want means understanding your limits. Attempting to operate like somebody with out ADHD solely pushed me farther from these alerts. ADHD brains want various kinds of relaxation—emotional, psychological, artistic, bodily, passive.
I don’t recharge by watching TV. I recharge by studying, cooking, taking lengthy walks, and training Pilates. To outsiders, it’d seem like I’m all the time going, however this sort of motion restores me. Generally, organizing a junk drawer is self-care. Different occasions, it’s a warning signal. After I’m mentally drained, TV helps. After I’m emotionally overwhelmed, it makes me really feel caught. Studying the distinction modified every thing.
A notice on worthiness.
We’re taught to measure our price by what we produce. A part of my midlife journey has been rejecting that, untangling my worth from my output, and specializing in making slightly than measuring. In case you’re within the thick of that, this submit is probably not what you want at this time.
Your price isn’t your work. However making—creating, shifting, shaping one thing from nothing—is an expression of you. It’s life-giving. It’s confidence-building. It’s the factor that may pull you out of a spiral earlier than it takes maintain. After I began honoring my interior drive to create, productiveness stopped being one thing I chased. It grew to become the pure results of discovering my movement. Momentum, not depletion. Creation, not extraction. And that modified every thing.
After I began honoring my interior drive to create, productiveness stopped being one thing I chased. It grew to become the pure results of discovering my movement. Momentum, not depletion. Creation, not extraction. And that modified every thing.
Residing with Limitations, Each Psychological and Bodily
I’m a working mom with hobbies, a social life, and a deep appreciation for evening’s sleep and each day bodily motion. I don’t need to give any of that up. So, I settle for that I don’t have lengthy, uninterrupted stretches for deep-focus work like I used to.
I additionally settle for that generally I don’t know if I would like relaxation or momentum. The one method to know is by tuning into my physique, and that requires emotional regulation, which can also be laborious to entry if you’re overstimulated.
My capability to entry my most “productive” self is proscribed and never constant. Realizing I’m not all the time going to make the precise selection helps me discover some grace slightly than falling right into a disgrace spiral. I used to make my lack of ability to get issues accomplished imply one thing about me as a human being. We don’t try this anymore. Some days I may give myself what I would like. Some days I simply mess up. Life goes on.
Reaching optimum productiveness day by day is unrealistic. After I do yoga, my physique can really feel solely totally different from in the future to the subsequent. Brains are like that too. There are occasions when work and life really feel like an uphill battle. Switching duties feels more durable than it ought to be. And there are seasons the place effectivity simply isn’t within the playing cards—accepting that has been key to discovering a manner via.
As a result of I don’t have hours to ease into focus, I’ve needed to hack my system. In doing that, I realized three important ideas that assist me get issues accomplished with a neurodivergent mind: simplicity, urgency, and momentum.
Right here’s how they form my each day life.
3 Ideas I Observe for Improved “Productiveness”
Precept 1: Simplicity
I keep easy methods for capturing concepts, documenting duties, and organizing the entire above. The bottom line is that the processes are simple to repeat and every thing is straightforward to entry—nothing is ever too sophisticated. That is paramount.
I take advantage of the Notes app and Reminders app on my cellphone in addition to Notion to avoid wasting concepts and duties. I additionally write issues down on paper as a result of I’ll by no means be a completely digital particular person. The mind processes handwriting fully in a different way than typing. Apart from Notion, the apps on my cellphone are VERY easy and simple to make use of.
I take advantage of the bucket system for digital recordsdata (and bodily objects in my residence), one thing I first realized about from KC Davis, writer of Learn how to Hold Home Whereas Drowning. I take advantage of digital buckets to arrange recordsdata on my laptop in these classes: To-Do Lists, Writing, Enterprise Initiatives, Content material Creation, Household, Our Dwelling, Studying, Finance, Psychological Well being, Cooking, Journey, Bodily Well being, and Shoppers.
Precept 2: Urgency
These of us who’re deeply accustomed to procrastination realize it’s a nasty behavior that “works” as a result of we get issues accomplished as soon as we really feel the stress of time. Nevertheless, I found that once I procrastinate and rush to get every thing accomplished shortly, I really feel like my work is missing as a result of I don’t have time to observe deep work and get all my concepts out. To interrupt the cycle of procrastination, I have to create my very own urgency. This precept comes into play by way of the timer I take advantage of (extra on this under).
Precept 3: Momentum
With any motion, I’ve lengthy identified the toughest half is getting began, which is why creating momentum is so essential. As a result of transitions are so tough for individuals with ADHD, the precept of momentum retains us going.
To create my each day momentum, I applied a morning routine that’s pared right down to the fundamentals and prioritizes essentially the most difficult factor first. I rise up, brew espresso, and sit right down to work instantly. This creates a pure inflow of dopamine that may carry me via the day. I used to meditate and stretch earlier than attending to work, and now I do it after I end one thing that takes numerous focus. I really feel wonderful and able to sort out something once I use momentum like this.
4 Productiveness Instruments I Swear By
For a similar causes I’m a fan of utilizing pen and paper, I like bodily instruments that aren’t on my cellphone. Listed below are the 4 I all the time have at my desk.
1. Keep on Observe Planner: This planner helps me plan the small print of every week.
2. Timer: That is for training the Pomodoro approach and for simulating and creating urgency and constraints. I’ve three of them.
3. The Brick: The Brick blocks choose apps on my cellphone for a set period of time. Having a bodily software to restrict my digital entry is essential for me. Brick wins for its simplicity.
4. Apple Headphones: To lock in and tune out. White noise, sound bowls, EDM, rap. Doesn’t matter what it’s so long as I can’t hear what’s happening round me.
I additionally flip to some choose assets and other people for recommendation on productiveness:
My Work Routine
On Sunday evening or Monday morning, I mind dump every thing into my Keep on Observe Planner—duties, concepts, and notes I’ve collected all through the week in my Notes and Reminders apps. Then, I take advantage of the Eisenhower Matrix to type what’s pressing, what can wait, what could be delegated, and what’s simply noise. I hate planning, however I’ve realized that pushing via this step makes every thing else simpler.
When it’s time to work, I take my brick and timer wherever I am going—whether or not it’s my workplace, the eating desk, or a espresso store. I placed on my headphones, decide a activity, and set a timer: 25 minutes for small duties like emails and captions, 45 minutes for deeper work like writing and design. The timer retains me from falling into perfectionism (which is simply procrastination in disguise).
I additionally set agency bodily and digital boundaries. My cellphone stays out of attain, my texts are on mute, and if my workplace divider is up, my household is aware of I would like uninterrupted time. It’s not good—youngsters nonetheless stroll in—however it helps everybody be extra conscious about what pressing really means.
On the finish of the day, I ask myself: Do I have to push via or name it an evening? If I really feel like ending my to-do record will show I “labored laborious sufficient,” I am going to mattress. If wrapping up one final activity will assist tomorrow’s momentum, I give myself 30 extra minutes. No inflexible guidelines—simply tuning in.
I used to make my lack of ability to get issues accomplished imply one thing about me as a human being. We don’t try this anymore. Some days I may give myself what I would like. Some days I simply mess up. Life goes on.
The Energy of Discomfort
I not take ease with no consideration as a result of I understand how laborious easy issues could be. I used to attend for the proper circumstances to jot down—now I jot issues down in the course of a grocery retailer. I comply with ease when it presents itself.
However discomfort is all the time there.
When huge tasks really feel overwhelming (hey, writing a e-book), I take into consideration Phil Stutz’s string of pearls idea—progress is simply including one small motion at a time. Some pearls aren’t nice, however the level is to maintain including them. Getting began is 80% of the battle, and resistance by no means absolutely disappears.
Over time, I’ve come to understand the ache of doing laborious issues. It’s stripped my ego from productiveness and proven me the meditative energy of merely doing. The ache of making comes from caring a lot that we’re afraid—and that’s stunning.
We don’t have to boss-babe our manner again to hustle tradition, however possibly we swung too far within the different route. I do know I did. Now, I consider self-care as self-respect: How can I make decisions at this time that honor what I care about most?
There’ll all the time be components of the method we hate, however the extra we do them, the higher we get at pushing via. And in doing so, we convey what we deeply care about to life.
Kate is the founding father of Wit & Delight. She is at present studying the way to play tennis and is endlessly testing the boundaries of her artistic muscle. Observe her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.
